Thursday, November 30

Headach Of Tears

Today been headaching once i wake up in the morning i was thinking of not to go to school for today but remember all the admin card i have to tap for my classmate it not they will be ja lat . so i die die also must go. enduring the pain so much pain yet i cover it up with a smile to people who i meet today.

Just a face to tell them not to worry. in my dream last night i dream of my dead and went to class as a soul that trying to give everyone my last goodbye. . . but it seem so sad and yet so scary to them . . .

Just nice kok yong called me to go school , cause he driving today oh thank god lol , reach and tap all the card , seat in the lecture just to pass my time cause really resting . . . my head so pain . . . i think i cry too much which hurt my mind already. . . after that got a 2hr break went to find yvonne at her house down stair . . . she so lazy bluff me all the way to her house de mac. . . say that meet her in sch then she say meet her at her mrt station then end up meeting her at her mac just below her house . what a way to treat a sick person all the way form school to her house mac. . .

Nvm then took cab to school as she eat until no more time lol. JL did call her and say she is have Gastric pain so didn't come for 2 day already. i donno why i still care but i do care lol. after class went to cell group today not that bad but tired and so headpain . . . T.T after that took cab home but i have no $ .. still O so many people $ oh my tml also didn't have $ to eat. first time end up with no $ . . .

K tml hope my last wish can come true. . . Sweet Dream alway . . .

Wednesday, November 29

Forgive Steph

Today on my way to school called and smsed yvonne don't be late end up also late and i have to go with her to lecture to help her beg of attandance . . . after that went for marketing lol then went to eat then study for the newtworking test lor as we don't have much time to do.

After lesson everyone have their own stuff to busy left me alone so kok yong drive us home. . . reached home, bath and use my pc for a while . . .then i went to rest on my bed crying again . . . my head so aching i try rubbing it it getting worst and all the sudden i fall a long sleep untill night. . . as i awake, replyed some sms and waiting for my brother to let me use the pc so i took out my bible to read and read and read. . .

PLS Everyone reading this i think i have made some mistake and i really grathe that if u all can forget what i have say to steph is all a misunderstanding so left it as it is . thank everyone for understanding .

The last thing i must do is to have a final chat with jian ling. that all i want. hope tml will be the day. as this drag so long already. k going to do someother stuff hope it help me to stable me mind . . . as i really going crazy about not to live for today anymore lol . . .

Those who care and readed should call me to let me know~ thanks good night

TEARS

"Wherever we go is okay,"
You said
Now what may have been
Has been stopped by timeOn that night that was too long
I had a dream where you left me
Staring at a foreign sky
I hugged my lonlinessMy fallen tears
Are piling up on the winds of time
At the end
I feel your breathDRY YOUR TEARS WITH LOVE
DRY YOUR TEARS WITH LOVELONELINESS... YOUR SILENT WHISPER
FILLS A RIVER OF TEARS THROUGH THE NIGHT
MEMORY... YOU NEVER LET ME CRY
AND YOU, YOU NEVER SAID GOODBYE
SOMETIMES OUR TEARS BLINDED THE LOVE
WE LOST OUR DREAMS ALONG THE WAY
BUT I NEVER THOUGHT YOU'D TRADE YOUR SOUL TO THE FATES
NEVER THOUGHT YOU'D LEAVE ME ALONETIME THROUGH THE RAIN HAS SET ME FREE
SANDS OF TIME WILL KEEP YOUR MEMORY
LOVE EVERLASTING FADES AWAY
ALIVE WITHIN YOUR BEATLESS HEARTDRY YOUR TEARS WITH LOVE
DRY YOUR TEARS WITH LOVEMy fallen tears
Are piling up on the winds of time
This feeling at the end
Makes my blue rose change*
DRY YOUR TEARS WITH LOVE
DRY YOUR TEARS WITH LOVEMy fallen tears are piled on the winds of time again
At the end I can feel your breath
DRY YOUR TEARS WITH LOVE
DRY YOUR TEARS WITH LOVE
DRY YOUR TEARS WITH LOVE
DRY YOUR TEARS WITH LOVE(talking)
If you could have taught me anything
You would have found what love is
If you could have taught me what was on your mind
I could have shown you the way
Someday... I will be before you
Have you ever thought about that time?
I never imagined the pictures of that night
For now I will try to live for you
And for...
I will try to live
Try to live the love, the dreams,
And finally, the tears.


each of my tears mean every single thing we did before that why i never stop crying. . . .

Tuesday, November 28

Prayer Meeting

Been tearing since last night . . . don't really sleep well . . . around afternoon went to meet up with Ernest to go for prayer meeting at YMCA school . . . i pray with all my heart and my tears keep dripping non-stop i feel so hurt went steph say that everything i have done for them was all wrong and always making problem for them.

After that went to eat at plaza sing. . . and then took a train back home and is already 9pm suppose to meet james to come my house to study with him one but too late already.

Also tml my cisco test now revision lor. just wakeup from a deep sleep cause last night didn't get to sleep well . . . i sweat well sleeping . . . that wired . . . and my eyes hurt also . . .

I wanna talk to you so badly but i donno how to face u with so much problem. . . Dream well . . .

CLICK HERE

Monday, November 27

My Fault

All is because of me , making thing worst . . . Steph don't want to talk about it anymore. . . she just want to leaves it as it was. . . cause the only thing i do is getting her on more problem.

Why everyone belevies me not her why i have my wrong doing but why u all blame her. . .

I even bet everything for tml meet out to talk but she don't want it why. . . i losing everything why she don't want it.

Wendays I think i going to keen down infront of the class to do somthing about it. cause she worth beening friend what she teachers me is alot . . .

I tear chatting with her on msn i donno what to do anymore, i maybe never will talk to anyone of them anymore. i hurt 3 time and this time i really wanna die so badly. . . i just want to talk that all why cannot me more simple that . . .

Sunday, November 26

Nothing More Or Less

Today nothing much just hung around my PC and playing game doing my project work. . .

Suppose today sani come over . . . but he too tired to do so so next week laio hize SAD_SAD.

Hmm sometime i wonder how come people so easy to get a relationship yet mine seem so hard lol. . . but hearing all from my friend is all bad new they break up and stuff . . .

But one thing i believes is that you have to earn what yours ,don't just go tell other how you like him/her and also let time bring it together. i have done what i have done but that was just small little thing that i can do for her, i still have greater things that i can do! but need to wait until the time is right so at the mean time i will still do those small little stuff for her :P

I made a history in POLY and in my life , so many wrong doing and learn alot from everyone i have been with. . . so i have fainth in whatever i do from now on, no wondring just do what i can/will do~ next event CHRISTMAS ~

Sweet Dream to all my friend who reading it now , i know everyone having their own problem but i knoe for sure soon u all will get your answer to you problem. . . have a good night rest~

Saturday, November 25

Prayer Answed . . .

Today went for afternoon service lol very exciting lor as today will show to total pledged :P ~ then after service i have bible study lesson so called CIC not bad la still have someone i know to accompany me :P then take train home as suppose to meet up with chee siang to go eat but since he went to eat with his ns friend so i want to wood grove to eat alone as i walking there i called some of my friend that always use to come out to eat ah seng and kok yong & cui peng ~ lol.

They all come accompany me anyway but was after i have finish eating lor hahaha was talking about stuff here and there planning of event in December . . .

Reached home have a break and went online :P oh many more homework as just reciveved a mail from tai yong . . . tml my friend coming over to help me.

Just Spented all my time to chat on msn with my friend , some of my friend so long never chat so got to catch up with it ~ and just chated with steph. . . now i know what happen she angry with me for making so much problem in her life that all she didn't tell JL about anything. . . is someone who is close to me who stab me from behide and trow the blaming on steph . . . no wonder that day she so fire up and kick me out from the project group ~ . . . and yet so many people have know what have happen as i talk and blog it online . . . monday i will boardcast the ANSWER to everyone who reading and wanted to know who is the stabber who stab me so hard that now i lose every feeling in the world. . .

What am i going to do to that person depend on how heavry that person sin is. . .
k going to bed really really hurt in my heart that i blame on the wrong person ~

Good Night . . . i been betray i should know earlier now it hurts more cause more people have been hurt by me. . .

Friday, November 24

Jiang Ling Surprise Birthday

Wake up late again . . . then prepare for today as we need to go school to do project. . . so today Jiang ling birthday and all have been work out as the class have planed . . . hmm the U2 bag was too Observe to see it so search my store room for some other brand de bag . . . On my way to school was thinking of taking mrt but took taxi as it was raining and i don;t want the present to be wet.

The reach school went to lab and meet up with some of my classmate and we start doing vb . . . teached them and yin qi help me wrap the present and stuff. . . as von suddenly bring her come and we like stune and yin qi hide the present just in time phew . . .

After that next lesson they went to eat and we off to do our work today very rush . . . too much thing to do nearly overtime doing it. . . i was so busy runing all over the place to help my classmate don't even have time to do mine work . . . lucky yvonne help me to clear most of them.
then i remeber i haven wirte the birthday card. lol donno what to write hize. too much to tell her but is a brithday card so nothing much to write just asked her to call me ~

lol second time given people brithday card and with all people de signature i see laio very happy is like wa they willing to write that card lor. then also everyone helping me . . . i'm too touch donno what to do at that time also and i really afaird that she mighty don;t accpect it . . . and was thinking asking other people to give her rather then my self as she still don't wish to talk to me.

Then was walking out of the classroom then the class they all pulled me back in to the room and ask me to give her so i'm stune . . . and i walked all the way to her desk and called her and i say to her wish you happy birthday and i hand over her the gift and the class started to sing her birthday song as she was brass in red with her face and then she teared out . . . and i know she still don't wanna talk to me so i left the room with my classmate and went home .

On the way to mrt station yvonne reciever JL sms asking the present is form the class or from me. . . hahahah hize . . . then she never reply anymore~ if she happen to talk to me early on, i was thinking of taking her out to dinner with some of the classmate !!! but it already turn out well so i don't think i will ask for more ~ thanks god for letting such a beautiful day. . .

After that went to cwp with to eat LJS acompany by jeffery . . . ;P ar~
what has been planed:
1) bring the present to yin qi to wrap without her knowing about it.
2) let her think that i did care anymore hahahaha but i did care alot lor.
3) let her think that i don't wanna give that present anymore so i pass it to yin qi as i empty handed
4) wait till end of school then give her the present.
5) sing her a birthday song
6) Treat her eat dinner if she got talk to me if not never mind lor.


Don't mean to make her cry . . . hize but is her birthday anyway :P all the best gal may your wish come ture~ really really want to talk to you so much is already been 3 week since i speak a work to you ~ Endurencs + Petition = Ture Heart! k hope some day you will speak to me again. . .

This is what i want to tell you by the song of : 星语心愿

我要控制我自己
不会让谁看见我哭泣
装作漠不关心你
不愿想起你 怪自己没有勇气
心痛得无法呼吸
找不到你留下的痕迹
眼睁睁的看见你
却无能为力
任你消失在世界的尽头
找不到坚强的理由
再也感觉不到你的温柔
告诉我星空在那头
那里是否有尽头
心痛得无法呼吸
找不到昨天留下的痕迹
眼睁睁的看见你 却无能为力
任你消失在世界的尽头
找不到坚强的理由
再也感觉不到你的温柔
告诉我星空在那头
那里是否有尽头
就向流星许个心愿
让你知道我爱你

Happy 20th Birthday~Sweeties Dream Ever ~

Thursday, November 23

Fought For Four Days

21 November 2006
Today Yvonne Me, Ivy ,Sandy , and ivy friend we all meet up and went to eat at orchard and we went to play pool lol nice ~ after that we went to eat after that we went to party world to sign Karaoke lol this is what yvonne alway wanted :P and all those pro singer . . . not for me lol they really sing well ~ after that Guo xin come down to find us but ah seng never come . . . put plane again . . . nvm after signing we went to eat again then Guo Xin and Yvonne we home then left me ivy sandy , sandy bf and icy friend went to watch movie at plaza singapoura lol before the movie we have sometime but we all were hungry so we went to eat BK after that went to basement to find ivy classmate she work there and we have free tako pochi to eat lol... and we watched Royal Casino 007 :> very nice 2hr long after the movie already 12-midnight but sandy bf give us a ride back home as we all very tired. . .

Project Haven Finish Stress ar. . .

22 November 2006
Today not much lecture only morning first & second lesson that all lol in the afternoon went to use lab to do project . . . then later Gao Xin called yvonne say he will be coming to sch to apply Poly so yvonne was tired for the project so ok la we went to find him and late late after i finish what i need to done we went to eat at AMK central we ate Mos. Buger after that yvonne went to visit her friend so was thinking to go home but it started raining so we both went to play pool but miss wong called me and asked me that i forget about telling her about the oversea attachment. cause recently too much stuff to do so really having headach and not enought sleep.

Reached home start working on my project until 3am . . . finally have done some work and i happy for it. Yvonne got to do your work ar lol too much stuff hunging on to me already cannot breath. . .

23 November 2006
Today went lecture and i was thinking of talking to steph but she ignore me . . . or didn't hear me calling her. . . Wired . . . just once more day and is JL birthday so today i try my best already. yvonne didn't come to school today as she not feeling well so follow the class to eat then went to class to do that project again lol really hate that project been doing 16th time already and not once are correct de. during that class me and cp cannot finish and yet non of the classmate wanna help they just went to have their own dinner. . . nvm lucky teacher let us pass up tml .

After today lesson stay back in the lab to help tyrone, emily & yin qi to do their VB project. then after that went to sengkang with them on bus have a big chat on reacently what happen . . . lol and we saw a friend form another class so we all chat until we reach the interchange. . . and we went our way . . . lol how foolies of me taking the wrong direction of train to my friend house for Followship :P

Today having so much fun until i too tired lol first musical chair , then we eat and play risk lol making so much joke until we all really having a great time . . .

Is getting late and they plane more event coming soon :> k reach home by taxi . . . doing VB and helping friend too then also doing someother stuff lor tml big event and i'm too nerves . . . how how how . . .

K chee siang having a hard time training lol wish u all the best our prmoise satday bring u go out enjoy :P k see ya

good night and thank all my classmate today really having a good day hahahaha :P play alot , work harder. . . too!

GOOD NIGHT SWEET DREAM . . . Some day you will know the turth some day you will see the turth. until then i have to wait and wait . . . and hope i don't get in the way ~ MISS . . .

Monday, November 20

2 @ one go!!!

November 19 sunday

Went to marina square again for 2nd race :> but went there quite late already as i over slept hahaha as i reach there saw today so many people wor :> nice~ then really getting intersting as today both my car performe well thank ya ~

But still not enought to beat the 1st lol so went boot betteiry and also borrow motor from my firends :> as we don;t really have enought time so time up and they announce the winner :P k after the race went to took mrt with some race friend and we exchange contact but i went to vivo city to meet my parent after that we went to eat lol i was very hungry eat a triyaki chicken set and a mango ice kachan :> after that my father drove us home, as i reach home ate some more food again as i was hungry for more food . . . then i went out to meet Kok yong for supper. . . that all for the day.

Have a little chat with Steph still don't get what make her so angry about it. . . she told me she will told me went we in school. . . k sweet dream counting down the number. . .

November 20 Monday

Today reached school early as i was doing my work yvonne came early today not bad ya but still she sick . . . but today she seem much happier as she with yin qi and emily joking around hahaha. k then lesson started and steph and JL have been no where to seen but steph did come later on as she told yvonne that JL lost her phone which her father bought for her de. so she didn't come for the morning lesson and the lecture.

So i did try to help by going to the web to find service for tracking phone lol so many intersting stuff and i have try some of it but non-worked as some need to pay and some only tell u which country that number is currently in . . . didn;t even help much hahaha . . . but greatly she get it back her phone as the person is kind enought . . . but she still can say that that person don't know how to use her phone so and so . . . =_=lll

Today not bad la she got talking to classmate already seem so long time since that happen. then miss wrong called yvonne say that she want to catch up with us as three by three first yvonne , emily & yin qi went to see them . . . wonder who next?

Today lab test don;t seem to go so well as i don't even finish mine in time oh boy . . . really don't have enought time for me to think. which remide of year 1 sem 1 where JL come late for test and i did help her do all the cheating . . . now no people help me also hize . . . Counting down to time what to do! what to do!! what to do!!!!? went home with Cp they all and i want alone to eat at KFC as i waited for koen as he coming home also seem so long never see him but he still the same suffer from . . . nvm his performace coming soon check out his blog for the time and venue.

k too much words ,no one wanna read good night , i will keep praying . . . not matter i'm right nor wrong. some day they will know & i will have my answer.

Saturday, November 18

That All I Got

Today wake up late suppose to meet friend at Jurong east for icesketing at 9am i was late so get change and went by taxi ~ so long never sket still can manage abit la.

lol then there got someone birthday so it played the birthday song and it was raining bubble lol
around 12noon i went off as i have to go MARINA SQUARE LEVEL 3 KIDDY PALACE for my tamiya race lol having a hard time finding that place lol saw my friend there so long never keep in contact. and there goes the race only pay $5 for the whole day , fighting for the timing. . .

At first i was happy that i get first in place for about 1hr then more uncle come and i was kick to 6place . . . then ernest come and watch me after that he went to buy elizabeth birthday cake and present :> around 3pm+, then i meet elizabeth at city link so i ask my friend to help me collect my prize if i won any and i run off as she reach already and i ask her to help me buy hotdog bread cause i really no time to eat at this morning just drink milo only . . .

Thanks elizabeth o you big time. . . then we took mrt to expo together for service as today was her birthday too. then after service we have a small celebrating with her before we all left. . .
thought they all went to tamipniess but they went bedok so i went home as i left with no $ cause today i bought my birble lol finally got it after so long alway wanted to have one.

Then on my way home i called yvonne to ask her do her cisco luck i remeber cause it all end at 3pm today , then reach marsirling called chee siang to meet him as he just book out from camp and he seem so tired but he still good la come out to eat with me and borrow me the $.

People i O $
Adrial : $10.45 for the bible cause i only left with $30
Elizabeth : Hotdog Bread $
Yvonne : $20 that time dinner with her
Chee Siang : $5 for the supper

Total : about $ 35++
sad_Sad i still need $ to buy my tamiya car cause today i choing my car and it breaks . . . and all i left was few cent . . . tml i wanna go race again racing make me feel alive :> maybe meeting yvonne to bring her go play hahahah k see how tml feel so tired. and my leg hurt from today icesket . . .

Sweet Dream, i pray a joyful life for them~ all of you all. . .

Friday, November 17

Dark Arura

Today Went school late lol don't went for ELP and also late for lecture and all my classmate de card was with me and i don't tap it hize . . . sorry guys really tired and after that they skiped lecture went play arcade . . . after that we went back to school for 1pm lesson and i really almost cannot make it as i don't have VB 2003 at home . . . and today rushing my work as yvonne we at home resting as she is sick so all by my own . . . today class eveyone hate that teacher cause he never check out work and he went off telling us that we never finish in time and never let him check giving us low marks . . . still say that we are slower then the other class (as in lazy). . .

Next lesson this one i really sain as i donno what to do so i try all i can need to learn and catch up as you all know i been split up to group with yvonne so she not here and i have to choing all my work. only finish what today require to do the previous one i don't have. . . lucky for me i donno why i have to wisdom to do after i stugger alot went reading the question and thank to all my classmate that helped me Jeff helped me to finish the MS access work as i have to finish my project work. . .

After that was about night then i really hungry but don;t wanna eat at foodjunction as my mum got cook :> so went home with jeffery and tyrone. went cwp to buy a bread to eat on my way ,walking home. . .

At home doing cisco with tai yong lol we dicsuse togther and also vb =_=lll headspin like hell . . .
and just recive a e-mail that satday and sunday having tamiya race at marina square. . . lol tml cannot as i have icesket in the morning till afternoon and then went service. sunday will be going ba. k so my really is my fault? that everything happen on me is i deserve one? k lor if this is what is already planed LET IT BE!! and I'm Sorry . . . but really need to talk head to head about it as i really wanna know what really happen. . .

Just played BF2 lol seem so long never play . . . hize life is also like a battlefield see how start the war and end people life for furture. . . i hate war . . . k good night then guess that i won't ever been talking to you anymore bah~ is hard to say goodbye but day by day we will don't even know who already. . . but memory will alway remeber forever. . .

Something Tell me bad thing gonne strike on me!!!! but i'm in weak state now will i live for the day? god only knows. . .

Thursday, November 16

Investigation

Today lecture only me and jeffery lol so sain . . . nothing to do after lesson went talk talk to teacher :> hope can find soulotion but don't think that will help much so on with more lesson . . .

During break went pooling ~.~ hize so sain then went for next lesson. . . oh man i really have no heart in class . . . why? nvm after that went to town meet up with my friend to go cell group ~ :>~ we went city hall to eat and ya thought the cooker say that is not spicy but really spicy and my headaching too much stress . . .

After cell group feel much better. relax and pray all thing goes well ya . . . and we exchange information so today got much much more information then i need. but still to solve need to see my self what to do next~ k going to sleep good night very tired as last night hardly have enought sleep :P tml going TKD for sure . . .

Yvonne rest well . . . alway she sick de hahahaha oh ya tml got to pass up VB project sain i don't have vb 2003 how to do. . . called ivy she borrowed to friend . nvm tml go school do and keon busy with his performance got to go catch it right guys :>

k still gather information first if i'm in wrong i admit it if not what to amdit with no wrong doing?
but grathe that all my friend trying to help me out :P k i think is going to solve pretty soon~ everyone know what i'm doing around and yet she still think i'm the person she think i'm . . . i earn what right no cheat what's right. . .

Dream Eater ~ Time To End ~ angel will rise again.

Wednesday, November 15

Nei Jiu (Feel So Sorry)

Today went school with a heavry hard . . . and after the first lecture there no more lecture for today so we just hung around studying for the lab test . . . and they start questioning me what happen and all those stuff. . . i donno how to answer as i don't really get the point. i holding my tears back untill i kind of been so lough on them . . . sorry not to mean it.

Then later on marketing ~.~ so sain after that went to eat and went to find Min kai they all then we went to the lab to get ready lol today all change seat =_=lll as the lab test start first few question is easy but end up the the end of the paper is very hard. . . and people started copying.

After lesson went out with yvonne only cause eveyone seem to have their own event. kokyong ,Cp went home , minkai and his gf went out , yin qi and her friend, emily and her bf, jeff and some classmate went eat .

so me and yvonne took cab to orchade to walk and eat lol really joke alot hahahaha too funny until we sain 1/2 already something lough too much become very sickening lol. we have pizza and Lasagna spented me $42 lol i treat as yvonne treat me took cab . . . but end up no $ left.

After that i follow her to her interview hahahah then we lost donno where the mrt station and we anyhow walk get also can get there. thought going blowing with her and her family but sher mum don;t want so i went to meet up with adriel for bible study :P he seem so sick but still make and effect to give me and a friend bible study :P thank and hope you get well for tml~

So my day have ended as a long way home~ and i do more phone call and research on all the stuff that JL don't believe in me. i never do anything that harm her or what, i didn't lie cheat or steal my way. i earn my way ok. i went church since july 05 in a chinese church but don't really know how to write as i only hear. . . but i was lucky that steph bring me to W230 and now i'm so happy that i got to knwo more about the bible. . . lucky me i have save MSN history. . . just now spent all my time searching for my evidence. . . now i have my evidence i can prove to you i'm not what you think i am ok. the only wrong doing is the jacket only. . . that i sorry other you O me. . .

Then just now i talk in the phone with some of my friend and i cry yet my mom still ask me not to use HP to call as it can hurt my ear. . . wth lor i crying yet she still care for my ear . . . never mind but after i hung up she asked me what happen . . . i told her nothing much la just some classmate of mine kick me out of project group with no reson or what so ever. . . don't even tell me what she so angry about ~K too tired to continue...

Got to go sleep tml long day see ya good night. . . I cry I tears I'm hurt. . . but i pray with a smile hope everything will become right again, lord what have i done to make them hate or angry at me~ i feel so numb and stress with everything i have~ still enduring the pain. thought of runing wild for once but i'm scare~. . .

Sweet Dream~ only memories last. last night only a 2hr sleep that 2hr make me recall all the thing we been thought. now don't even have a chance to explain it. why alway gal don't give a chance to talk.

我不断的摸索自己,企图改变一些叹息
我知道你对我的期许,是将来眼光的抵御
你今日无助的词句,都带着明日的讯息
我知道你对我的心意,而我就是有心无力
我还有什么可以给你,我不断的问自己
我不断的想 不断的再找寻
我知道你一直都辛苦,为我默默的付出
就算流泪也不承认你哭,我是生在福中不知福
所以我用尽我的全部,来告诉你我没有认输
还有什么可以给你,我的爹娘我的父母
还有什么可以给你,我的爹娘我的父母!!

内疚. . . . sorry gal

Tuesday, November 14

Close To CWP

Today woke up late at 3pm and thought today im suppose to go work at yvonne shop but guess not as non of them call or sms me . . . so i went out with my sec school classmate to eat and watch them play arcade . . .

Then went to eat at KFC to eat and meet a old friend of mine :P after chat here and there we walk back to woodland and seat just below my blk playgound and chated . . . what to do in the next few month or so~ and adriel called me to go out tml :P

k nothing much just reach home and study for tml labtest all the best to me and all of you out there see you good night and thank for the time been~ sweet dream to you okay ?~

Monday, November 13

Not Afraid Of The Truth

School as usually . . . suppose to meet up min kai and some classmate de but then was late so like that lor. . . after that went to meet them anyway, borrowed a room use of only 30min and so . . . today the first lesson i don't even know what to do. . . so hard that subject hardly anyone in the class are listening and man few more week got to pass up the project already.

Need some help from my Pro friend hahaha. after that lecture . . . don't even bother what that leture teaching . . . she keep calling people to seat here and there . . . lol learn on my own better readed the lecture book on my own and also get CMS notes to see too . . . :P guess that once in my life CMS is usefull to me !

After that went to play acrade with classmate and only a few game there also make then enjoy a wonderfull day! oh ya got to work on report for the networking already ~.~ k k we see how !

After that kok yong drive us home ~ ar~ so tired . . . on my way back home saw tain wee lol thought my friend are at woodgrove eating but too bad not there. so i went home to eat my dinner. Called most of my friend on phone to for a chat to see how are them :P and there goes the time hahhaha. . . On with my game programing.

Wonder what will happen in my intersting life as adriel say have faith in god? k good night to all my friend out there no matter good or bad you are still are my friend. oh ya remember me of a bad friend "JACK"~.~!!! that i don't need to say his heart very "FOX" hard to be a friend but nice meeting you~ hahahah

I Told the truth already ! i have not done anything wrong why am i end up in this state? Puzzled for so long have no idea or clue what going on around me still a mystery to me , guess one day someone or somthing will hit on my and give me see the answer!!! good night sweet dream~

Sunday, November 12

The Best Yet To Come

Today Missed Morning event with my old friend . . . i over sleep. . . way too tired ~ after that noon was suppose to go outing with my sec school friend but i already promised my poly classmate to meet at 7.30pm at sambawang mrt . . . after we meet we took taxi to sembawang park 60 jalan mempurong lol to get seafood. . . very wo loo road lol . . . we reached and went to cui peng booked de table . . . :P lol and we started order . . :P now after eating we walked out to take bus lol too wo loo laio no bus no taxi. . . then went sun plaza to play arcade > after that we went home that all for today ! tml meeting Min kai early at school to do all the school work ! :P k see ya good night everyone i try not to think too much but i care too much hahaha besafe guys good night sweet dream!~

Saturday, November 11

Nothing Earn

Today overslep , suppost to meet jame go watch DOA but still overslept . . . sorry la i donno how i'm going to return you . . .

After that took off to expo . . . then went to eat at expo foodcout but i went to buy buger king lol. . . took a long way back home . . . nothing much suppose to meet up with cheesiang to go out too . . . really hate my life lol i'm so tired . . .

now off the sleep ,all the answer i need will be answed in the furture. . . so i have the WILL to wait for it. good night everyone and the one and only.

Friday, November 10

Staber Never Rise

Today went to school late lol cause cannot wakeup as i very sleepy! but is ok cause this morning was E-lecture so asked my classmate to help. As i reach still early lol.

Then went eat with some of the classmate and we went to lecture . . . lol talk more then listen. Follow on to lab, been doing fine alone in class, and then was busy doing all the homework or project work need to been done. and saw JL trouble with the vb code so send a copy to her since she ignored me. Great I don't even know what happened. . . also send a copy to some of my classmate.

Then on project work steph told teacher to break us up, fine with me lor want us to fail that subject, the best part is i don't even have a backup of the project form them lor me and Yvonne have to start from the starch, i don't even know that i'm a human anymore . . . been over stress and overshock form what have happen within this few weeks. i think i gonna be on hibernating. . .

After lesson went to CWP with yvonne and cui peng to catch a movie , sorry james they don't have time for DOA cause too late already so we tml then watch ok, after the show lol man was a funny movie then we went to eat at carvana ~.~ i'm over fulling ~.~ then von have to go she went to take taxi home as me and CP walked home.

Great Still On the Forground Wondering What Happen, went people on the background doing stuff i don't even know what i did wrong ~.~ I already left with nothing , really is nothing let for me. so i guess that all for me i'm done for now ~ still have to walk a long road to paradise.

I guess that networking steph will also do the same. . . so i think i have to start on that before end up with nothing again. JL take care i can no longer talk to u no more as either one of u wanna talk or tell me what going on!!! Good~Nite.

Hibernating . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Thursday, November 9

Stress !

Today very tired , i the only one went school to tap card but today jeffery come along with me la so is like wa lucky got people come. and then there was steph seating behinde was thinking of talking to her but i'm scare lol . . . got the feel like, my head wanna bomb already. . .

After the lesson went to blk M but there was no PC to use then we went to library cafe and saw steph there doing project. . . then there de com also no VB 2003 =_=lll so we do cisco instead. . .

Been very stress, feel like talking to them but they still ignore me like that . . . i really feel so bad within me. . . JL will know how it felt cause that time they having cold war and i can see it. really not the position you wanna be in.

Today early went off at 3pm so is like sain what to do. then went taking kok yong car home . . .
hize really cry on my way home lol asking people out to acommpany me to eat also no one was free. . . keon at sch, marcus at home going out soon . . .

Then reach home mum give me $20 for her toto she win . . . lol hize but still got so much to tell. went will i be able to told them all the stuff that happen to me?.. .. the present everyone was rite got xin yi can already no need to give so expensive de. . . but what to do? left with 14day. and i have the class support. k la going to bed wish me well, don't feel so well this few day at school.

Ivy & Sandy bought me a birtday gift really love it very much gals :> a wallet (i'm touched) but still been more touch by all the thing my sec sch & poly classmate done to me.

GOOD NIGHT TO EVERYONE HOPE ALL THE UNHAPPY STUFF CAN BE FORGOTTEN!
WISH TO SEE YOU LORD HELP EVERY SOUL WHO ARE INJURY & HURT >.<

Wednesday, November 8

No Tuning Point

Today kok Yong drives me Cui Peng , Jeffery and me to school and i have to go tap card cause almost all the class card is with me . . . then after that today nothing much during marketing. . .

When to find steph and JL at canteen but they still don;t really talk to me . . . nvm went back to lecture and only for a while we went out play pool lol . . . ok la play play then later went class . . . nothing much today hize . . .

After lesson went to eat then they all going home so kok yong drive me and cui peng home.

I found out that i been in church quite some time already just watched some video i took last time lol since july 2005 ~.~

Just went out to eat with kok yong hahahah now going to bed tml very sain cause everyone pass the card to me and i alone going to school . . . hize. life is tough one wrong move it really kick ur butt. no people is perfect, everyone make mistake... hize really donno what to do . . .
Really have a great time been with them hahaha hize let the fire burn all the pain to be gone~
Night everyone tml will be a better day bah hope so T.T still heartach after what have happen but still as everyone say still need to live for a life.

Tuesday, November 7

Wonder Wonder Wonder

Today been so lazy lol anyway fixing back my Pc to my room and doing lot of pc work lol nothing much hize i think about my future lor . . . what to do ~ sms JL to tell steph but never reply me guess they still ignore me bah hize. . . i donno why got this feeling so wired make me very scare lol. . .

K that all for now been playing gun bound lol. . . nothing much to do at home bah . . . just before my birthday already end up like this hize, and i don't even get greeting form them for my birthday guess i'm no longer important to them , feeling so down why i think is my cell making it so hard for me as once i done a wrong thing it happen make me feel so bad. . . hope it wont affect my studies , have e-mailed steph cause i think both of them already blocked me form msn ? k good night ~ tml see how. . . i wanna talk to them again, went will i have that chance? . . .

oh god pls help me , i seek for the peace in our life , no more quarrel , no more hate , no more any of this just want them to be happy as normal pls , I pray in the spirit of the light ,heal them all .

how i wish i have both of them will celebrate with me but never once i donno why hize . . .

good night sweet dream!~

Monday, November 6

Don't You Realize?

Today early been scolded by my mun cause i haven clear up my pc and it till in the living room with my TV lol. . . k then went off to school as i went over to CWP to get a present for min kai hahah been a happy giver but who will give me? lol . . . .

Then reach school give the parent to MK lol then he was wondering whereter to open it out of not hahahah then he open is a micky mouse mug lol very nice that mug hahaha :P
after that went with the class to next lesson =_=lll after that in the lecture lol yvonne change place and seat with me to chat and all the suddenly there is a quiz . . . and i thought wanted to sms steph to told them got quiz but i forget she lost her hp . . . then was sms JL but she reach already so nvm . . . and the quiz was very tricky . . .

But something was wrong in the picture . . . today steph and JL seem a bit wired no like noramly day . . . hmm wondering what happen? after i reach FJ von went out to meet her friend so i acompany my classmate to eat and went to play arcade and pool lol... they all play until very rolf lol . . . after that went to play pool and then went back to lesson. . . today lesson very intersting.

After doing my work went over to talk to steph but end up she very unhappy at me and i don't know what i have done making her so angry. then i try guessing who make her so angry . . . but i really have no clude . . . and i feel so unwell within me . . . really wondering what have happen. . .

which make me think back i remeber in the lecture yvonne and JL was talking about steph somthing something and i didn't really listen... and they have been very slient . . . and i called yvonne what happen why they both so anger on me. . . ? and von say that she told them more drama story . . . and i get wack . . . ask von forcs me to say and me myslef don't want to say + cp also helping me not to tell anything is better and up yvonne focse me to talk if not she went over to steph and complain . . .
To Steph if u are reading this pls note and read twice : the only thing i told her is about she going to church that all. . . and i really don;t wanna give you any more trouble and problem for u anymore...
Also blame on my self for been so nice too people alway giving away extra infroamtion which cause everything . . . sometime i really donno who i can trust and not to trust. . . but some sercet i need to keep for steph regradless life or dead lol is really important~
This is the ending u want yvonne? by saying all out make u feel better and making more people feeling worst !!! and not once but this is the 3nd time already. . . 1th time with tyrone, u went to told him and complain about the thing that i told you. . . 2nd time about the data of exame . . . now this . . . how many more you wanna do !!! but u really need to change on this
k going to bed soon but my heart is worry about all three party =_=lll why need to be like this have u all forgetton all the thing we do~!~ pls make handsake and forget all the hates. . . good night .

Sunday, November 5

My 20th Birthday

Today wake up early around 11pm then went to set my PC up at living room. . . cause today CG people coming over my house lol and my mun and dad keep nagging at me lol. . . but then after their come and we played lot of thing and my parent bought chicken curry and mee hon for them to eat lol why my parent keep asking people to eat lol. . .

Some time i really dislike my mun so nagging at thing lol but i also know la she really need someone to talk as she love to talk lol. . .thought today steph coming over my house but she never. . . but yesterday she say she will be coming ? . . . After they left suppost to go vivo city with my poly classmate but was already 7pm and no time to reach there in time so i sms them i'm sorry cannot make it on time ~.~ suppost to go dinner with my parent de but i never hize very upsad that i never get to go eat with them. . . and my parent bought me my FV ham and marshroom pasta :D thanks . . . and a sorry for been rude cause was alone at home and i missed all the outing with my classmate.

Then asked chee wei to come over to keep me acompany thank and u really are quite lol talk more lol if not i will be board hahaha k thank any way :P he help me clear all the remaining food lol power saio but also free dinner for him :P

After he left kok Yong called me and they all from vivo city sing me a birthday song really touched me cause today i thought no one care lol .. .. but now i know from their voice seem so touching to me. . . and Min kai happy birthday to you also~

After that qin seng called me down to my blk for a celebrating bah and i thought only a few coming but went i reach i was stune already so many people on the playgound then they fake me in to a chat then all the suddenly sing me a birthday song and marcus holding a cake . . . OMG i almost tear out lol but holding it back so hard cause they never say got any celebrating ~.~
and then we ate the cake and char for awhile and left. . .

People Who Wished Me:
From Friendster : Zhe Sheng, Amelia & Vivan
From Msn : Angeline , James , Sheng Yew, Yang Feng, Yvonne , Yion Qi & Mel
Form SMS : Jiang Ling , Ying Qi , Chee Wie , Vivan , Yvonne , Wei Wen , Kok Yong , Chee Siang & Marcus
W230 & My Parent~:P

After Today Really was very fun i cannot wish for anything more . . . but there is just one wish there wont come ture lol guess bah is a simply wish but is seem hard to that person lol. k going to sleep once more HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MIN KAI AND MY SELF SWEET DREAM~

Saturday, November 4

Answer & Question

Today wake up late lol so after my breakfast went to race then as i have no enought time so i never try much after that went to take mrt as i have 1hr to reach there . . . went i reach tanjong paga i have no enought time left . . . so took a cab =_=lll as i reach just now . . . cst me $18 hize. . .

Then after service CG member celebrate pearlyn and my birthday together and they gift de me a shirt how nice thank guys and i made a wish that i will tell my parent about coming to church but i know they don;t like it..

They went out to eat as i went home cause quite tired after all . . . after resting and my parent reach home from their karaoke lol i told them but still get scolding from them la asking me not to go anymore lol . . . hize but i try see how lor.

K going to bed thanks everyone . . . tml what to do ? no idea maybe having some friend over to my house bah . . .

Those have wished me happy birthday thank to : Yin Qi, chee siang, CG member , Vanessa ,chee wei & JL (writing it on msn nick =_=lll). . . and most of all my parent hahahah ~.~ they bought me a cake and asking me tml go out to eat with them . . . :P but the cake hor my sister eat already =_=lll haven even blow candle hahaha nvm la . . .

Just played Battle Field 2142 nice but my computer lag lol . . . k going to sleep . . . Wish will be granted if u have the heart to go do it . . . my wish is simply but hard to do~ i will wait for the time when it is correct for me to grant my wish. . . Sweet Dream to everyone out reading my blog good night and let have a good day tml :P

Friday, November 3

Energyless

Today trying to be active in school but just cannot my mind still not there and i'm like a zombie ... still making steph and JL wordless by my unawake mind with all the word i ask and say . . . sorry guys really cannot . . . need more rest

After today lesson been doing all the cms & cisco test for them . . . today yvonne never come to school wonder why never reply my sms. . . don't alway like that not coming come for the sake ok. then after school went to take mrt together with JL and steph. . . JL going to CG and steph went with me to woodgrove to eat prata :P but on the way we saw her friend :> . . . non me and JL know that guy.

A long way back and steph lost her phone in school again . . . how many time need will this curry on no good u know. . . hize . . . k then have a chat and eat with them....

Thoes who know my brithday thanks hahahahahah no event for my brithday leh hahaha. . . a ready know what suppost to happen hize am i a friend to her ? lol nvm guess i'm not he friend after all just a tool. . . lol to her , her good friend was only steph. . .

Was really tired just arranged some of my photo and saw many happy monent that i photo it nice. . . k tml a good day hope i can pass that day. . . good night sweet dream....

We are the Stars, that shine around the world
You are the star, that's i will wait for you.
You are my star, that's will bring the world happiness
We are journey to the Star

Thursday, November 2

Got To Have Faith

Today morning lesson only 5 people in my class attende lol after that went to eat and go to went to library cafe to use the pc there to do CISCO lol i have the files with all the answer :P min kai , tai yong , JL , steph and me lol then cannot find the files thought never save it in there and i online ask my brother so send me though msn then end up wasting time cause the rar files cannot been read as that pc don;t have winrar. . .

Then also found out that we have the files in my tumbdrive lol so later on jeff and jeffery come along so we all do the quiz there then went to lesson lol today lesson was intersting lol as i having headach =_=lll unlike me today doing nothing at all hize . . . then all the work done by JL and steph =_=lll after that lesson went to bought some food to eat :> then like that lor. CP today very lame and funny lol as well as our class donno why alway this lesson very funny and intersting .

After lesson went to bishan with Yvonne :> lol share ice-cream with her =_=lll as she cannot finish all then went to that shop to see again and bought it this time :> hope i not making wrong decision again HAND OF FAITH pls help me i pray and pray every night and day. . . some day the light will shine . then after that went meet friend to go cell group lol today very fun ..... and also very very tired for me hize why no one care ? hmmm strange a 2 story bus just park below my block lol so big very odd....
photo edit by : JL
k going to bed early bah want to have more rest as i dieing without rest...

Wednesday, November 1

U2 at Town

Today went school late by 1min. . . i run somemore . . . and reach tap card was 8.10am then i tap it change to 8.11am . . . sain 1/2 today lecture very cold lol....

After that went to marketing lol slack down there... then after that Steph me and JL went to eat KFC at ang mo kio central there goes my bus fee . . . sain alway i'm the disavatage they have bus concasion i don't . . .

Nvm after the last lesson went town with yvonne lol we bought food window shopping and chat lol we walk pass this hall of arts : nice >>>>

Then we went searching for US shop as i wanna buy something... but too bad there don't have sell then yvonne went to meet her friend so i take mrt back home as i decide to went to bishan to look for what i want and also stopped and went buy Tako Pochi hahah and some food to bring home to eat. . .

Nice got what i wanted but is the last pieces hmmm then went back to home lol . . .

Just played NEED FOR SPEED CARBON & viewed C&C 3 tribrian war very nice lol EA sure invent good game ~!!!

Just few day till my birthday lol sain1/2 what to do hmmm no idea~ k good night sweet dream always...